We sang a worship song today called From the Inside Out.
It went right along with what the Lord has been speaking to me this week. I continue to struggle with trusting the Lord to provide and make clear how I am to support myself, and He takes me to Matthew 6:25-34 and reminds me not to be anxious about tomorrow.
When I left the cult I gladly threw out all my clothes and began restocking my empty closet finding all the best consignment shops on the Plateau. I think, in an attempt to redefine myself with attire I like (instead of dressing like everyone else or how others expect me to), I began changing myself from the outside.
But God has a different take than me…
Do not be anxious then, saying ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘With what shall we clothe ourselves?’
“For all these things the Gentiles eagerly seek; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.
But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added to you.
Therefore do not be anxious for tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Rather than focusing on change from the outside in, I give Him control and choose to allow Him to consume me from the inside out.
I choose to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, knowing that He will take care of me.
And as I travel on this journey He will teach me to embrace justice and praise so I might learn to love Him from the inside out.
My heart, my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
“From the Inside Out” – Hillsong United