In my quiet time this morning I came across a scripture that really spoke to me.
The LORD redeemeth the soul of his servants; and none of them that trust in him shall be desolate. Psalm 34:22
I will have to say that this month has been an emotional roller coaster ride. The heights of joy and exhilaration at how God is at work in my life, followed by deep despair and desolation.
The dictionary describes the adjective this way:
Desolated: barren or laid waste; devastated:
The devastation of having everything stolen from me by the cult still stings. I still feel devastated, barren…the enemy having laid waste to my heart and life for 12 years. I think I am, in many ways, still in shock. I am ready for the emotions to be over and done with, but they seem to enjoy startling me with a surprise visit now and again. I surprise myself with how easily the tears still come, at the most inopportune times.
In my Key Word Bible I found that the word desolation comes from the Hebrew word:
Shamem: to stun, to grow numb, to devastate, to stupefy, to be astonished, to be appalled; to be desolate, waste, ravaged, solitary, or depopulated; to destroy, to lay waste; to despair, to ruin oneself, to be destitute….The word was used to describe Tamar after she was raped by Amnon (2 Sam. 13:20). It is something so horrible that it can leave a person speechless, (Job 21:5).
(From the Lexical Aids to the Old Testament)
As I read these words I grieve not only for the way I was ravaged spiritually and financially but once again for the victims of Malcolm Fraser. The desolation his perversion has caused his young victims, one of which I know is my granddaughter, is appalling, despicable, hideous. The horror of it left one victim speechless for 7 years until God began to work the courage in her heart to speak up. I long for God to work that same courage in my granddaughter.
And as I grab ahold of Psalm 34:22 and continue to trust in the Lord as He redeems my soul from the cult’s destruction and devastation, I choose to believe His Word. I choose to allow Him to heal my desolation even though the process is a painful one.
And as I allow Him to do so, I pray for the same work to be accomplished in the ravaged hearts of the rest of his victims.