One year ago today, I was delivered out of captivity by a mighty God.
Darkness, oppression and hopelessness had become my new “normal” after twelve years of feeding on scriptures presented out of context with an evil motive to manipulate and control (i.e. intimidate).
Imagine my shock when God’s light pierced my world. Squinting at the brilliance of His holiness, I emerged from a deep pit of despair.
Imagine my amazement to find that what I had grown to believe God to be was a complete lie from the pit of hell.
Imagine my relief to re-learn that God’s grace means there is nothing I can do to make God love me more, or love me less, than He already does.
It’s by no accident that this time of year has national historical significance with compelling spiritual parallels.
First of all, this weekend we celebrate Veteran’s Day with those we honor who’ve fought to defend our freedom and lived to tell about it.
Not only did many of my friends and loved ones fight in prayer on my behalf while I was trapped in captivity, but I too fought the war for my soul, and praise God, survived and now live to tell about it.
Another historic occasion that occurred over the 9th and 10th of November was the fall of the Berlin wall. My Facebook friend Brad Sargent shared this with me:
November 9 is considered the “official” beginning of taking down the Berlin Wall, and there is a photo there from November 10th of people WALKING through the infamous Checkpoint Charlie, to experience the freedom of the West. It still took time for a complete dismantling to occur, but the way to freedom had been irrevocably opened …
There’s been much dismantling occurring this past 12 months, and I’m quite sure there is more to come…but the way to my freedom, as well, has been irrevocably opened and I look forward to complete healing and restoration in my future.
How fitting it was that last weekend, as I attended a church service with some very special friends, that a woman quoted a scripture that sliced my heart like a razor-sharp knife.
Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs. (Jonah 2:8)
This is a scripture that the cult convinced me to wield as a weapon with which to bludgeon my firstborn son. Since he refused to throw his new bride under the bus (you know, “hate his wife” like Luke 14:26 says he has to do) and come and join the cult with us, he was clearly clinging to a worthless idol (his wife), and forfeiting the “grace” that could be his.
How freeing it was to realize, sitting in that church service last Sunday, that it was really I who was clinging to the worthless idol of Sound Doctrine and the false shepherd that I allowed to become my Holy Spirit. It was I who was forfeiting the grace that could be mine!
This is the kind of revelation that hurts and heals at the same time.
What a joy it is to have the Lord continue to undo every scripture wrongly applied in my life.
May I continue to be soft-hearted enough to allow Him to keep showing me more and more of His true goodness and faithfulness in exchange for the lie I believed for so long.